Posted in books

Book Review: I Wish He Had Come With Instructions

Way on back in the 90s, girls I worked with were reading copies of Men Are From Mars; Women Are From Venus. Why? Because dangit, we wanted to know what the guys we were dating or married to or just interested in were thinking! We wanted the inside scoop so we’d be able to get them to do what we liked!

The book brought to light the definite differences in the way men and women think and perceive things. So why would we need any more books on the subject? Easy – different ways of explaining men, newer ideas and discoveries, and just a different voice. This one is a gem:


The publisher’s blurb:

What Is He Really Thinking?

When a woman begins a relationship with a man, she may think she’s found her knight in shining armor. As the relationship continues, that armor can begin to feel like a barricade she just can’t get past it. What’s he hiding in there, anyway?

Relationship and communication expert Mike Bechtle offers women an insider’s guide to the puzzling male brain. Simple and practical, this book provides women with a roadmap for better conversations and improved relationships. Bechtle reminds readers that men and women share many similarities, and by embracing those similarities they can better deal with differences. He explains how men think, act, communicate, and grow in relationships, and even offers tips for communicating in a toxic relationship.

Wives, girlfriends, mothers, daughters, friends, and coworkers will find real help within these pages.

What did I think of the book?

Dr. Bechtle writes as though he’s sitting in your living room, sharing a cup of coffee with you and answering questions you’ve always wanted to ask. (Or have already been asking, but not getting good answers!) He explains what the guy is thinking – or if he’s thinking anything at all! – when you interrupt his game watching, or when he seems to forget the conversation you had a couple days ago. He tells you why that guy is reacting that way, and not in the way you would think to react.

Oh, and he answers the age-old question: “Why won’t he ask for directions???”

He explains that you can’t change a man, no matter how much you want to. There are things that are specifically him and specifically masculine that is part of his hard wiring. But he does let you in on how to understand that hard wiring, and how to communicate more effectively and how to look through the masculine lens at life rather than the feminine lens.

This is a great book for not only understanding your husband or boyfriend, but for figuring out the rest of the males in your life! I have to add here that Dr. Bechtle is adamant that he is speaking about healthy-minded men in general, not abusive or controlling men. And remember: people all are different and have their own quirks and personalities, and their personal histories can color how they perceive things. The book takes all this into consideration, and gives some of the best advice I have ever come across when dealing with men.


**I was sent this copy from Revell in exchange for my fair and honest opinion.**



Syd is a Midwestern girl who doesn’t think the term “girl” is sexist in the least – especially after she left her 20s. She holds a huge love for history (from WWI through the end of WWII, Victorian, Regency, and Elizabethan eras), some science fiction, and likes to pass the time reading, working with photography and needlework, and writing things. Lots of things. Syd likes to dance, too, but she looks like an utter goob doing so!

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